We all have a story to tell

We all have a Story to Tell

Just thought I should send a message to let you know that I appreciate and fully support your page. 
I am a regular member who is currently serving in an operational capacity. I have almost 10 years service with the RCMP and two years with a volunteer fire department prior to joining. Through this I have seen things that I wish I hadn’t and been through things that I had to do at the time that stick with me to this day.

These things, in conjunction with being on call for months on end with no downtime, led me from PTSD into the spiral of depression. I was at the point of looking down the barrel of my gun, or faking a traffic accident so that it wouldn’t look like a suicide for the sake of my family. That way they wouldn’t have to live with that stigma.

Lucky for me, I was able to finally get the help that I needed, although it wasn’t voluntary. I was off work for six months and on medication for depression. I found that there were two main things that irritated me out of this experience. The first was the fact that I was diagnosed with depression. I didn’t feel that was me. The second was trying to get back to work when I felt I was better. Then I had to start jumping through the RCMP hoops to get back, when that was all I wanted.

As a result, I got back to work, but vowed to myself that I would try to help and prevent people from traveling the road I went down. I think that your page is a good step in the right direction, especially for spouses that may have no idea what is going on with their significant other. It took me almost two years to tell my wife how far I was down that dark and terrifying path.

Thank you for your work.

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