How many times over the years have I seen new excited members become disillusioned lonely on the edge member in a few years. They have fallen prey to the myth of putting the force first because the force is your “family”. This is not okay, you will lose your family, possibly turn to substances to fill the void or thrown yourself into work to numb the pain. The force is NOT your family, your spouse and kids are. To remain a healthy member you need to perform 100% on your regular shifts and walk away in your time off which is designed to recharge and heal you.
If you have fallen into this trap and you decide to try to earn your life then you need to get help. You may need assessment and counselling and you may be lucky enough to get your spouse to go to counselling with you to see if you can heal your relationship. This is your cross roads where you must reclaim your family and put your career into perspective.
Policing is about compassion, integrity, community honour justice and truth. Family is about the same attributes but add in comfort, solace companionship growth peace and love. Years from now when your career is over (as mine is) the only ones around you will be your family, not the force, no one but your family and a few good friends.
For those members who fallen victim to this trap please take the time to decide what you want from life and then do what it takes to get it. I said no to the force and yes to my family all through my career, and now my son and his wife visit us three times a week, we go on family outings and you want to know where the force is? They are my past and the few members who were true friends I keep in touch with are all family orientated members.
So you must decide what you need to do to secure not only the present, but your future. You do not walk alone, we are here and truly here with hundreds of years of combined experience, we welcome you into our ranks.
David J Hale